Before I started this part of recovery 16+ months ago I did not tell my husband what was going on. I did do one disclosure 6 years before that time but during those 6 years I still hid my thoughts & behaviors from him.
One of the things I had to do for good, healthy healing was to be honest, with my husband (and myself). So I went from NOT sharing my struggles to OVER sharing my struggles with my husband. I want to be honest with him and not hide or lie to him anymore. This is a boundary issue, I don't have good boundaries but I am learning.
With my recent struggles it has really caused a lot of distress in my husband and part of that is due to my over sharing my struggles. Giving him more information than he needs or even wants. I thought that was what he needed but I am learning....slowly at times.....that this is NOT healthy for either of us. I have a great sponsor, therapist and recovery family to share my struggles with.
So I have asked him what he really wants and he does want to know when I am struggling and then if he wants more than that he will ask but I still need to keep it simple with no details or anything.
Working to be honest but not over share is going to take some time and effort on my part as I am really working on being honest and building intimacy with my husband.
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